Engorged Ribs: A Hardcore Dining Experience

This post is dedicated to the pervert person that landed on our blog after Google-searching “half handful tits”. First of all, why stop at half a handful? Why not go all the way? The second shout-out goes to the cannibal searching for “boiled cooked tits”…. WHAT?? And as for Mr. (or Ms.) “Resistance Orgasm”… NSA must be having a blast with your search history.

As part of our dedication, with this post, we wish to simplify their future searches:

With the moist weather gone at last, we decided to thrust ourselves lustfully into the art of barbecuing. We simply rubbed some succulent ribs and caressed some meaty wings with glistening sauce and smacked them onto the grill: the result was juicy, tender and bursting with exotic flavor – a carnal experience that titillates the senses and left us gasping for more.

Eastern Spareribs

Ribs and Chicken

Serves 4-5

You’ll need
1.5kg spare ribs
80ml honey
60ml soy sauce
45 ml oyster sauce
15ml sesame oil
30ml brown sugar
7cm ginger, grated
3 cloves of garlic, crushed
2 ml cayenne pepper
juice of 1 lemon and 1 lime
grated zest of 1 orange
1ml ground cinnamon
1ml ground cumin
1ml five spice powder

  1. Mix all of the above ingredients together to make your wonderful sizzling marinade.
  2. Slather the ribs with the marinade and let them suck it up for a few hours.
  3. Grill over medium-hot coals (they burn quickly), brushing from time to time with the remaining marinade, until cooked through and crispy.
  4. Now the next steps we didnt read/ignored/forgot about, but they sound nice, so DO THEM (and give us feedback).
  5. Bring the leftover marinade to a boil until glistening and serve with the ribs. Along with some lemon slices.

One two three four – SCORE
[Numerical ratings are out of four, where four is best/healthiest/hardest.]
Taste: 3.5, deductions for the minor first degree burns some of the ribs caught.
Difficulty: 1 – easy, all you have to do is rub, smack, watch out for the squirts and finally squeeze the lemon.
Healthiness: 3
Cost: Pricey. Ribs can get expensive. As can all the ingredients if you don’t already have the basics (soy sauce, honey, oyster sauce, sesame oil, etc) in your cupboard.
Overall: 3.7

Advertisements

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s